Relationship Goals: Part 4

Major Keys to Marriage

^^ Watch the full sermon here! ^^


Marriage is supposed to reflect God’s relationship with the church.


Key Point 1:
God was always supposed to be in the middle – He is Love, He Gave.

Your relationship with God dictates how all of your other relationships will go. 

Ephesians 5:25

You can’t have a real relationship unless you have a relationship with God first

Your responses are not valid just because you feel they are justified.

Ephesians 4:31-32
Matthew 22:37-39

Put God first and He is the greatest – everything else will get blessed. 

Marriage is a lot of giving – where are you getting from? You constantly need God. 

2 Corinthians 6:14-18

Be in relationship with people who have the same priorities (God first). 

We all need:

  • Daily devotional life
  • Pray – every day
  • Have time of worship

Major Key: God must be the center of your life


Key Point 2:
Know the difference between what your spouse needs and what they want.

No person can ever give you:

  • Identity
  • Purpose
  • Accept you 

If you don’t already know that, you will always put that pressure on someone else and always be disappointed. 

Nobody can fill a God hole.

Women Need:

  • Security
    • Emotionally and physically
  • Affection
    • Not sex → can be a result but not motivation
  • Communication 
    • Empathize and relate

Men Need:

  • Honor/respect
    • Hold him in high regard
      1. Allow him to fail – be his partner, not his mother
      2. Let God be the enforcer
      3. Honor the man you want him to be, maybe not where he currently is
  • Support
    • “Now the Lord God said, It is not good (sufficient, satisfactory) that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper meet (suitable, adapted, complementary) for him.” Genesis 2:18
  • Sex
    • Context of marriage
    • 1 Corinthians Chapter 7

When the needs aren’t met – the quality of the marriage goes down and they find someone else to meet the need.


Key Point 3:
Communication is Crucial

Major Key: Love languages

Proverbs 18:21
Ephesians 4:29-32

Your words are either building up the person you want to be married to, or tearing down the person you have to be married to. 

1 Peter 3:1-4

Resolves Conflict:

  • Be gentle – humble/meak
  • Be quiet – unbothered/undisturbed, peace

Cut out unspoken expectations.

Major Key: Speak what you expect

Satan’s plan is to divide and conquer

God’s plan is to unite and conquer


Key Point 4:
Never Pause on Pursuit

Never stop pursuing

The destination is not marriage, the destination is “till death do us part.”

God’s purpose is that you win in relationships. 

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